Top 5 Drunks in Gaming

Top-5-Drunks-in-GamingDrinking and gaming is something many of us will no doubt mix on a weekend, although the two are rarely found together in the digital realm. When they do appear though, you're almost always guaranteed a laugh thanks to some of these timeless characters. Always remember to drink responsibly, because this lot sure as hell won’t!

5. Bo’ Rai Cho (Mortal Kombat)

All hail the King of the Drunken Fist! Bo' Rai Cho first staggered into the tournament for Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance, adding a touch of class to this otherwise uncouth brawl with his vomit puddles and lethal flatulence. He also sports a formidable beer belly, which allows him to crush an opponent to death as a Fatality move. After all, who needs a six pack when you're rockin' a keg?

4. Luba (Leisure Suit Larry: Magna cum Laude)

This list’s only lady (and I use the term in the loosest possible sense), Luba earns her spot not just for her own permanent state of drunkenness but because Larry too must be sufficiently plastered in order to strike up a conversation (for “conversation”, read “incoherent whooping and yelling.”) Their dates consist of hanging out at the bar, playing quarters, hanging out at the bar again and drunken trampolining. Kids, PLEASE don't try that at home! As Larry's sort-of romantic conquest, Luba will gift him with a beer bong. What else?

3. Conker (Conker’s Bad Fur Day)

How could we NOT mention Conker's Bad Fur Day in this list? He’s even holding a pint on the box art. The game opens with an epic night on the lash and our hero getting lost on the way home. Cue the robotic teddy bears and singing poo! Oddly enough, Conker wasn’t created to be a foul-mouthed drunkard. He first appeared as a driver in Diddy Kong Racing and his first solo outing, Conker’s Pocket Tales, was a cute and kid-friendly platformer. Somewhere out there, a mother squirrel is asking herself “Where did it all go wrong?”

2. Gragas (League of Legends)

Gragas takes boozing to a whole other level – basically this guy LIVES to drink! The Rabble Rouser’s abilities include “Happy Hour” and “Drunken Rage” and he can usually be seen carrying a trusty keg. His goal of reaching a “divine state of intoxication”, so far thwarted by his inhuman tolerance for alcohol, has led him on a quest to brew the ultimate ale. But does Gragas ever worry that he might have made some poor lifestyle choices? Not likely! In his own words “The only time I have a drinking problem is when I spill it!” Legendary.

1. Super Drunk (Bubble Bobble)

Is it a BIRD? Is it a PLANE? Is it a DRUNK? No – it’s SUPER DRUNK! This guy is the last boss in Bubble Bobble and is literally bouncing of the walls when you meet him. He’s a giant version of the standard enemy “Drunk”; a glaze-eyed, rosy-cheeked leprechaun who attacks by throwing bottles. Do I detect a hint of national stereotyping there? Oh Japan! As with all the characters in Bubble Bobble, Super Drunk’s name was changed for the international releases, so you might know him as “Grumple Grommit”. It doesn’t have quite the same ring.

Honourable mentions:

Jecht and Auron (Final Fantasy X)

One guardian carries a massive flask of booze everywhere, the other got so legendarily wasted that he accidentally stabbed a shoopuf (a.k.a. “big elephant-type thingy”.) I can only imagine that Lord Braska's pilgrimage began as a massive pub crawl.

The old man in Kanto who teaches you to catch Pokémon (Pokémon Red, Blue & Yellow)

We all believed he was sleepy till he got his morning coffee. But no – in the original Japanese version, he got drunk and passed out in the middle of the road. Now THAT’S the kind of person you want hanging around with young kids!

Commander Shepard (Mass Effect 2)

“Put more of the stuff in the... thing... more stuff goes in” – Shep might regret that last order, as the next thing you’ll see is the Commander regaining consciousness on the floor of the Afterlife club toilet. Yeah, it’s embarrassing but at least his/her dancing doesn’t get any worse!


Last Updated ( 02 May 2014 )  

Lindsay Robertson

Lindsay is freelance writer, librarian and all-round pop culture junkie. She considers herself a Game Historian (like that’s even a thing!), enjoys debunking controversies and particularly loves any game where girls kick ass. Being Scottish, she can usually be found at the bar.

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Comments 

+1 (Link to this comment) breakupthespace 2014-05-06 23:36
What.. no Vodka Drunkenski from the arcade Punch Out!!?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soda_Popinski
(Link to this comment) adam763 2014-05-11 15:44
I'm sooo glad Conker made it here!!
Even today, after playing it a billion times, it still amuses :lol:
(Link to this comment) thenephilim 2014-05-13 10:31
Couple there I wouldn't really go for myself (would never include Leisure Suit Larry in anything tbh)

Especially omitting Grayson Hunt from Bulletstorm, there was even an achievement for killing so many enemies while drunk...the "Space Pirate" achievement
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